Eckhart Tolle, the author of The Power of Now, teaches the power of being in the present moment and releasing fears from the past. It isn’t always easy because it is natural for people to create and maintain problems. Problems can give us a sense of identity. We often hold onto our pain far beyond its ability to serve us.
We replay images of past mistakes over and over again in our heads. We allow feelings of shame and regret to shape our actions in the present.
Lori Deschene the founder of TinyBuddha.com, an empowering website dedicated to simplifying lives and reducing mental clutter, writes about this topic. When we play out regrets in our minds, we cannot move forward. In Deschene’s article, “40 Ways to Let Go and Feel Less Pain,” she shares, “We cling to frustration and worry about the future, as if the act of fixation somehow gives us power. We hold stress in our minds and bodies, potentially creating serious health issues, and accept that state of tension as the norm.”
Here are some examples from Tinybuddha.com on how to let go of regrets and feel less pain:
• www.Tinybuddha.com Change your perception — see the root cause as a blessing in disguise.
• Make a list of your accomplishments — even the small ones — and add to it daily.
• Feel it fully —If you stifle your feelings, they may leak out and affect everyone around you — not just the person who inspired your anger. Before you can let go of any emotion you have to feel it fully.
• Remind yourself that anger hurts you more than the person who upset you and visualize it melting away as an act of kindness to yourself.
• Remind yourself these are your only three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it. These acts create happiness; holding onto bitterness never does.
Learning to let go of the past is a powerful way to relax into your life. By learning to appreciate the moment, we can enjoy more opportunities. Numerous studies have been performed to determine the link between happiness and living in the moment. Psychologists at Harvard University collected information on the daily activities, thoughts and feelings of 2,250 volunteers to find out how often they were focused on what they were doing and what made them most happy. They found that people were happiest when having sex, exercising, or in conversation and least happy when working, resting, or using a home computer. Although the subjects’ minds were wandering nearly half of the time, this consistently made them less happy. The team concluded that reminiscing, thinking ahead, or daydreaming tends to make people more miserable, even when they are thinking about something pleasant. By practicing staying in the moment and letting past fears subside, we can settle into our lives more comfortably.
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She is best-selling author of three books about happiness, including Find Your Happy and Adventures for Your Soul. She appears regularly as a happiness expert on AM Northwest and Huff Post Live, and was named among the “Top 100 Women to Watch in Wellness” by the Mind Body Green. Shannon's the founder of Playwiththeworld.com, an award-winning self-help and personal development website. She's an author, international life coach, teacher, travel writer and inspirational speaker who left her job in advertising several years ago to follow her heart and become a writer.
Her work has been recognized in media outlets across the globe such as HuffPost Live, Health Magazine, Australian Vogue, Women’s Health, Spirituality & Health and Entrepreneur magazine. Everything Shannon does is to help you connect to your true self and unapologetically live your authentic purpose.
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